Leaving...

"If life is a sheet of paper, I would fill the corners with colours and leave the very center white."

If there is one thing all six, not one, not two, but six, of us share right now, a frozen heart would be it. For those stuck in the broil, our past response would have been to get to the bottom of things and sort out the mess, because our hearts were still warm and forgiving. We never felt burdened in sharing and sacrificing, because our hearts were pure and easily contented. Why now, have we all changed? I feel so stupid sometimes, shedding tears for I ache to go back in time, back when everything was fine. Don't anyone of you ever reminisce the past? Or have our hearts harden so?

I'm disappointed in many things but above all, I'm disappointed with myself. I no longer feel like I belong, and I hate myself for it. I hate myself for giving up now, and having to see all our efforts crumbling right in front of our eyes.

This will be my final post in The House, which had once laughed, sparkled and basked with pure happiness, but has now been scarred, tormented and ridiculed.

I have a message for everyone, so there'll be 5 notes here, one for each of you unnamed. So take whichever you feel most connected to:

~ You have been fragile, and possibly still do. When emotions are hard to handle, just let it all out, and we'll try to be there for you, but please give us time.

~ Among us all, I feel like our views have been the most dissimilar when it comes to petty stuff, but I look up to you when it comes to handling the larger ones. I really do.

~ I'm sorry for never really getting to know you, and probably you would rather not want us to. Though I may not know what you think, I know for sure that I miss the old you. I miss her very much.

~ I can't say I fully agree with your choice of actions sometimes, and I believe we've talked it through. But I daresay, you're a person who cares really well for close friends, and I'm thankful for everything.

~ I want to thank you dearly for all your efforts in keeping this house whole. We see them, just we never get the chance to acknowledge them. It must be hard for you, being the bridge and having to be patient with us. Sorry.

Goodbye, The House.